Happiness is the highest from of health

Communicating With Dementia

  • Assist With Toileting Needs- A person with dementia may have trouble communicating their bladder is full or that they are constipated. Assisting them with a regular toileting schedule can ensure this isn’t the cause of agitation. Simply asking them if they need to go can often trigger them to remember to use the bathroom.
  • Check Pain Level- Pain is often the cause of agitation and behavior issues for someone suffering from dementia. You may ask them if they’re in pain, and many times they will say “No.” But if you notice grimacing or rubbing a joint or their stomach, often times they are in pain. It can be almost impossible to communicate with a dementia patient who is pain. It is important to treat this pain appropriately with medications, rest, or various other methods.
  • Check Their Hunger- A person with dementia may not always know they’re hungry, or they may not remember how to ask for something to eat. Asking the person if they’re hungry or simply offering a snack at routine intervals can help prevent behavior issues caused from hunger.
  • Hot or Cold- You may notice your patient or loved one is pacing a lot and very agitated. Check their temperature by feeling their skin. Are they hot or cold? It is not uncommon for a patient with dementia to put on multiple layers of clothes, or barely any clothes. Thus they may become very hot or cold quickly and not realize they need a jacket or to remove some layers of clothes. Even if they appear to be dressed appropriately, checking their temperature by feeling their skin will tell you if they are too hot or too cold.
  • Infection- Often times a dementia patient will exhibit behavioral issues and agitation without any apparent reason. An infection can cause major behavior changes and agitation, and there may be no other symptoms. If you’re trying to communicate with a dementia patient, and there isn’t anything that is working to calm them, it may be time for the doctor to check that patient. A urinary tract infection is one of the major causes of behavior changes in dementia patients.

Types of Fidgets for Children With ADHD


A common issue with children that have ADHD is not being able to settle. This means they are less able to stay focused on something that is taking place in front of them. Fidget toys of this nature are intended to mold, twist or bend into different shapes. Other items that can be a calming influence include a weighted lap pad, a coiled bracelet, plastic nuts and bolts, or a fuzzy pipe cleaner.


Many children with ADHD benefit from handling something that has a light, color, or noise to help with staying focused. A great toy to give the desired stimulation includes colored puzzles that easily snap together, pull apart, bend or twist. Other options include the color-changing light-up balls and spinning tops.

This type of toy may be a bit disruptive for the classroom environment, so its use may be limited to time in the home. It is certain to help a child stay focused while listening to an audio book or similar activity.


The chewy style of toy can help overcome chewing or biting related issues. They are made in safe FDA-approved materials that are free from BPA, lead, phthalates and heavy metals. This is a great way to keep the mouth occupied while still being quite socially appropriate when outside the home. It stops inappropriate chewing that can lead to biting or sucking on fingers, hair, sleeves, nails, or a pencil. Other options include using chewable distractions like silicone jewelry or pencil toppers. Also, the use of gum is the less embarrassing option for the older child or adult.


The resistance type of toy is great for the children that are more able to focus when their hands are kept busy. A simple solution for this is therapeutic putty. This is a great toy for squeezing, pulling or pushing. Other objects of this type include magnetic balls, squishy toys, stress balls, and kneaded erasers.


A further type of toy to help with ADHD is the tactile toys. They are useful for the children that need to be touching something to be able to focus. They have different textures and vary from scratchy, slimy, gooey and sticky. Other options include Velcro strips, rubbery squeeze, kinetic sand, and play foam.

Triggers Impact Mental Health

Psychological triggers among individuals coping with addiction and psychiatric illnesses are more likely to induce the feelings of anxiety, panic, discouragement, or other uncomfortable states of emotion. Moreover, the exposure to these triggers increase the risk of re-engaging in unhealthy behaviors and negative thinking among people with mental disorders.

Therefore, it is essential to know the ins and outs of these triggers. By developing the ability to identify triggers and implementing measures to reduce their impact on life, a person can significantly dissuade the aggravation of the symptoms of psychiatric diseases in the long run. In fact, triggers can influence moods and behaviors even among individuals not affected by mental disorders.

Although a person cannot predict, identify and avoid all triggers, building effective coping mechanisms can prevent negative effects by strengthening a person’s ability to exercise control over them.

Though reacting to triggers is a normal thing, one should keep this point in mind that most reactions are built subconsciously over a long period of time. Some forms of coping are very maladaptive in nature that can cause a person to be in a constant state of anxiety and distress. This not only worsens his or her mental health symptoms, but also prevent him or her from exploring more adaptive ways to deal with their triggers.

As such, a person’s reaction to triggers is not understood well. However, it is believed to emanate from the sensory memories and the formation of habits. When a person perceives patterns that resemble his or her traumatic experiences, it is very likely that he or she is probably already responding to a trigger. After certain time of the traumatic event, the person’s efforts to cope with the incident coerces him or her to form certain habits.

Most of the times, these habits are not beneficial to the person and over time it can become deeply ingrained or his or her second nature. Such individuals are unlikely to be aware of the psychological impact of their natural reaction and the habits they demonstrate, especially when the trauma is fresh in their mind. Therefore, it is essential to keep a check on one’s potential triggers to avoid serious consequences, particularly on mental health.

Among various types of mental disorders, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) has a large number of psychological triggers. Some of the negative life experiences, such as death, injury, sexual assault or other debilitating incidents, can lead to the onset of PTSD in people. When the brain links certain sight, sound, smell, circumstances and places to the sensory memories of the traumatic event, it could potentially trigger his or her memories of that incident and coerce him or her to relive it again.

Triggers also play a crucial role in dictating the chances of a relapse among individuals with substance use disorder (SUD). People with mental health problems and SUD aware of their unique triggers for relapse should plan their day to avoid some places or people that can reignite distress and cravings.

Correspondingly, they could find ways to controlling their thought so that their mind and body does not give in to the pressure of a trigger. It is unlikely that a person will be able to stay away from his or her triggers at all times, but it could significantly reduce the hardwiring of their negative automatic responses.

Sovereign Health is a leading provider of behavioral health treatment services that offers continuum of care and high-quality treatment services to adults and adolescents affected by mental disorders or substance abuse. We understand the intricate relationship between triggers and mental disorders, as well as the way they negatively affect the lives of many people.


Narcissism lies on a continuum from healthy to pathological. Healthy narcissism is part of normal human functioning. It represents required self – love and confidence based on real achievements and the ability to overcome setbacks. But, narcissism becomes a problem when one becomes excessively preoccupied with the self and seeks complete admiration and attention, with complete disregard for others’ feelings. Lack of satisfaction of this need leads to substance abuse and major depressive disorders. In adolescents, this causes ‘Substance Dependency Disorder’ (SDD) – they display overt narcissistic and prosocial behaviours, which show a connection between self – centeredness and addiction. These substances include sedatives like alcohol, psychedelics and hallucinogens like marijuana and LSD, stimulants like cocaine, narcotics like opium, heroin, and morphine, and anti-anxiety drugs like Xanax.

“Narcissists unconsciously deny an unstated and intolerably poor self – image through inflation. They turn themselves into glittering figures of immense grandeur, surrounded by psychologically impenetrable walls. The goal of this self – deception is to be impervious to greatly feared external criticism, and to their own rolling sea of doubts.” This is how Elan Golomb describes NPD, in her book ‘Trapped in the Mirror’. The narcissists fail to achieve intimacy with anyone as they view other people like items in a vending machine, and uses them to serve their own needs, never being able to acknowledge that others might have their own feelings too.

Narcissism is filled with irony and paradox, whether as a character trait or as a clinical disease. Emily Levine says, “I thought Narcissism was about self – love till someone told me there is a flip – side to it… it is unrequited self – love.” It must be remembered that, Narcissus weeps to find out that his image does not return his love. This indicates that, a loving engagement with the self does not, and cannot, come from putting on lofty airs, acting with self – satisfied arrogance or being obsessed with assorted fantasies of ideal brilliance or beauty. Healthy, non – egotistical self – love arises from an unconditional acceptance of the self, without having to declare superiority over others. Deep down, the narcissists know, albeit unconsciously, that they are not really what they project. In fact, one of their central defenses is to endlessly project onto others the very flaws and fears that they are unable or unwilling, to allow into awareness. They are critical of others’ shortcomings, but completely blind to their own – their self – love must be seen as an illusion, a spectacular triumph of self – deception. They can only love their false, idealized self – a mirage that cannot possibly return the fantasy – laden love. Their flawed self, hidden beneath their outward bravado, remains locked up and placed in permanent exile. And, to continuously safeguard themselves from a reality that so frequently contradicts their grandiose assumptions and pretensions, they are forced to employ a massive defense stratagem, with extraordinary rigidity.

Although very few of us are actually diagnosed with NPD, almost all of us are guilty of sharing certain narcissistic tendencies. So, Todd Solondz says, “Narcissism and self – deception are survival mechanisms without which many of us might just jump off the bridge.” For true narcissists, the defenses are absolutely necessary to compensate their ego deficits and reduce feelings of shame. Without them, they might result in a state of suicidal depression; for, narcissists do not really like themselves – the more they boast and demean others, they are more likely to cover up for their deeper, largely hidden feelings of inferiority and lack of love. Blinded by their idealized self – image, they try to project themselves as gifted, exceptional and unique – that in turn makes them egotistical and arrogant. According to TS Eliot, “… half the harm that is done in this world is due to people who want to feel important. They don’t mean to do harm but the harm [that they cause] does not interest them. Or they do not see it or they justify it because they are absorbed in the endless struggle to think well of themselves.” This shows a distinction between narcissists who are malevolent, and those who simply lack concern of how their behaviour might adversely affect others. It is yet another way of gaining attention to their supreme self – absorption, which makes it impossible for them to identify with others’ feelings.

Kurt Cobain says, “I don’t care what you think, unless it is about me.” This shows the narcissist’s indifference to the outer world unless it specifically relates to them. They are completely incapable of a genuine interest in others’ matters unless they are needed for the former’s assertion of superiority. Narcissists are also great con – artists; after all, they always succeed in deceiving themselves. It becomes particularly painful when they suffer from memory loss, when, they lose out parts of the person they love the most. In general, a narcissist “devours people, consumes their output, and casts the empty, wreathing shells aside”, says Sam Vaknin. Hate is a complement of fear, and the narcissists like being feared – it provides them with an intoxicating sensation of omnipotence. The difference between Narcissism and self – love is a matter of depth. Narcissus falls in love not with the self, but with an image or reflection of the self, with the persona, the mask. Narcissists see themselves through the eyes of others, changes their lifestyle and behaviour and expression of feelings, according to others’ admiration. Narcissism is voluntary blindness, an agreement not to look beneath the surface. Yet, Oscar Wilde says, “To love oneself is the beginning of a life – long romance” – this notion of self – love leans towards the pathological and the auto – erotic as well.

Anxiety May Lead to SUD and Vice Versa

Anxiety disorders impact nearly 40 million Americans aged 18 or older. This translates into a significant 18.1 percent of the adult population. There are various kinds of anxiety disorders, such as social anxiety disorder (SAD), generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) and phobia. An untreated anxiety disorder can lead to substance abuse. Given below are few scenarios where a person with an anxiety-related condition develops a substance use disorder (SUD) or vice versa:

  • Self-medication brings relief to such people from fearful thoughts and excessive worry about impending events.
  • Prolonged use of a drug changes brain chemistry that alters the way one behaves, thinks and feels.
  • People suffering from social phobia are often prescribed benzodiazepines, which are addictive in nature. Prolonged and consistent use beyond the doctor’s advice results in one getting caught in the cycle of abuse and addiction.

The chances of delayed diagnosis and treatment or misdiagnosis of co-occurring disorders are high due to the complexity and severity of the symptoms. A patient might be treated just for one condition while the other remains hidden. In order to provide complete relief and make the recovery long-lasting, it is imperative to treat the co-occurring disorders simultaneously. Undiagnosed, untreated or insufficiently treated cases increase the likelihood of suicide and death.

For a long time, tranquilizers like benzodiazepines were considered the apt treatment for anxiety. In some cases, even antidepressants are prescribed. Though both anxiety and depression are distinct mental health conditions, both revolve around serotonin, the mood regulator hormone. Currently, the most common medications for anxiety disorders include selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs), selective norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors (SNRIs) and older tricyclic antidepressants.

Apart from medications, there are various therapies that are beneficial in treating co-occurring disorders, such as:

  • Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT): CBT is a combination of psychotherapy and behavioral therapy. Its goal is to identify and understand the root cause of the problem, and improve the way one thinks and behaves.
  • Eye movement and desensitization reprocessing (EMDR): It is a revolutionary therapy which is highly effective in the treatment of patients with a trauma or past anxiety. The therapy is based on bilateral stimulation and right/left eye movements, which have the effect of activating the opposite sides of the brain. In the process, emotional experiences that are often the root of a mental health condition are released. The effect is cathartic and the individual feels free.
  • Mindfulness: Mindfulness therapy is related to the Zen philosophy of being in the present instead of dwelling either in the future or in the past. Living in the future is the root cause of anxiety and depression, whereas being obsessed about the past is stressful. When a person is mindful, he/she stays active, becomes aware of the surroundings and takes into account current experiences without taking stress by anticipating what lies ahead.

According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America (ADAA), only a third of people with anxiety disorders seek medical assistance. Anxiety disorders are treatable, provided one seeks timely help. If delayed, it may give rise to an SUD, leading to a more complicated condition – dual diagnosis. It is even more important to treat co-occurring disorders using an integrated approach that requires collaboration across disciplines. This can help in reducing cost of hospitalization and those related to loss of productivity, and improve the overall quality of life.

Sociopath or Narcissist

To qualify for a diagnosis of APD, the patient must have had a conduct disorder by 15 years old, and show at least four of these traits:

Doesn’t sustain consistent work (or school)
Doesn’t conform to social norms, including unlawful behavior whether or not arrested
Disregards the truth, indicated by repeated lying, conning, using aliases, not paying debts
Impulsive or fails to plan ahead; moves around without a goal
Irritable and aggressive; e.g., fights or assaults
Recklessly disregards safety of self or others
Consistently irresponsible, as indicated by repeated failure to sustain consistent work behavior or honor financial obligations
Lacks remorse, and feels justified in having hurt, mistreated, or stolen from another
Doesn’t sustain monogamy for more than one year
Irresponsible and negligent as a parent
Types of Narcissists – Malignant and Closet Narcissist

Some narcissists can look like sociopaths, but there are narcissists who aren’t malicious and who care about their families. Those who have all or most of the 9 criteria for a diagnosis of NPD (only five are necessary), and who exhibit them intensely and/or frequently, are considered malignant narcissists. They’re more exploitative, vicious, and destructive.

There are several types of narcissists – ranging from the common “Exhibitionist Narcissist” to the inhibited or “Closet Narcissist,” coined by psychoanalyst James Masterson. They may have an inferior self-image and show evidence of depression and emptiness, which the exhibitionist narcissist also has but hides, (also from him or herself). Rather than seek attention, the closet narcissist may shun it and even act humble. Like codependents, they are uplifted through the idealization of others. Contrary to some popular beliefs, this does not make codependents closet narcissists. The latter still lack real empathy and believe in their specialness and sense of entitlement, even in their martyrdom.

Both sociopaths and malignant narcissists can be charming, intelligent, seductive, and successful. They share similar traits of being unreliable, self-centered, insincere, dishonest, and needing control. Both malignant narcissists and people with APD have an inflated view of themselves and sense of entitlement. Even when they’re abusive, they believe they’re justified and deny responsibility for their behavior. They lack insight, empathy, and emotional responsiveness. Although they might feign appropriate emotional reactions, this is a learned behavior and not sincerely felt. Narcissists who have fewer and less severe symptoms, along with “narcissistic” people who don’t have full-blown NPD, can have insight, guilt, remorse, and an ability to emotionally connect, as well as love.

While sociopaths qualify as narcissists, not all narcissists are sociopaths. What drives them differs. But the main distinction is that a sociopath is more cunning and manipulative, because their ego isn’t always at stake. In fact, they don’t have any real personality. They’re the ultimate con artists and can take on any persona that suits them. Thus, they may be harder to spot, because they’re not trying to impress you or win your approval – unless it serves their agenda. Instead of bragging, their conversation might center on you rather than on themselves, and they can even be self-effacing and apologetic if it serves their goal.

Like premeditated killers, a sociopath is more calculating and might plot and plan an attack months in advance; whereas, a narcissist is more likely to react sooner, using intimidation and lies. Sociopaths are lazier and try to swindle, steal, or exploit others financially, while many narcissists though exploitative, work hard to achieve their aims or perfection. Although both characters may be motivated to win at all costs, narcissists are more interested in what you think of them. They need others’ admiration. This makes them dependent and codependent on others, and actually capable of being manipulated. They’re less likely to divorce their spouse than a sociopath, who might leave or vanish if they’re exposed or don’t get what they want.

People with NPD or APD don’t usually seek treatment, unless, in the case of NPD, they’re experiencing severe stress, depression, or their partner insists. Those with APD are sometimes unwillingly court-ordered to therapy, which in itself becomes a hurdle to overcome in terms of trust and receptivity. Therapy should focus on helping them access their feelings and learn from the negative consequences of their behavior.

Many narcissists can improve with treatment, and those who have insight can benefit from psychodynamic psychotherapy. If you suspect you’re in a relationship with a narcissist, learn more about and get a checklist of narcissistic behaviors.

Human Microbiome and Mood Swings

It is considered that the baby in the womb is sterile. It is not until birth that the baby has its first exposure to the mother’s microbiome while passing through the virginal canal. That, together with the microbiome in the breast milk, plays a crucial role in the onset of the immune system development. (Hence, babies born through Caesarean and/or not breast-fed have weaker immune systems). Later on in life, the microbiome is constantly being influenced by exposure to the environment. (Thus, over-sterilization and the constant use of anti-microbial soaps, etc. affects negatively the development of the human microbiome). One interesting thing to note here is that playing with dogs (but not with cats!) helps build a healthy microbiome. And last but not least, proper nutrition and avoidance of medication is another factor in keeping our microbiome healthy.

Now, we know that the microbes help digestion, immune system functioning and the production of vitamins, among other things. But did you know that the same microbes play a role in our emotions and brain development?

Microbes make two important compounds, ARA and DHA, both of which tell brain cells to divide. Hence, these compounds are crucial for babies and young children as their brains are still growing and developing. ARA and DHA have been shown to pay an important role in learning and memory.

Furthermore, gut bacteria send signals to the brain as they make neuro-transmitters such as melatonin (regulates sleep and inflammation), acetylcholine (regulates endocrine and REM sleep function), GABA (regulates anxiety) and serotonin (regulates, mood, social behavior, appetite, sex drive, sleep and memory), to name but a few. In other words, the state of the gut microbiome can determine to a large degree whether you are going to be feel happy or depressed.

How to build a healthy microbiome

  • Eat plenty of soluble and insoluble fiber as well as probiotic foods.
  • Avoid sugar, alcohol and dead (i.e. processed) food.
  • Avoid antibiotics – they don’t kill viruses, they kill all the good microbes, and they make pathological bacteria more resistant.

Meaning Of Dreams And Mental Health

The information I had was very different from the false information of the commercial world. The special information I had in dream messages proves that the unconscious mind discovered by Carl Jung really is God’s mind.

Now that the satanic origin of the human conscience was discovered you have to realize that you must always look for signs of absurdity and evilness in your thoughts and in your behavior, and also when you analyze other people’s personality and their attitude in various situations.

Your dreams help you verify the depth of your absurdity and evilness in order to correct your behavior and help you think based on God’s wisdom. They also help you analyze other people’s behavior and identify various signs of absurdity and evilness in their personality.

God helps you become a psychologist and understand how the human brain works. He gives you many lessons in every dream.

Now you know that your satanic anti-conscience never stops trying to destroy your conscience through craziness and despair. So, you know that you must protect your conscience and stop accepting absurd and evil thoughts as if they were inoffensive and they could be helpful.

Now you know that you must be suspicious and always look for the real intention of every thought that pops up in your mind.

Your dreams help you understand the influence of your anti-conscience in your mind and in your behavior and in other people’s words and reactions.

Everyone inherits a satanic anti-conscience. Some people seem to be more balanced, but everyone inherits a demon in their brain. The demon can be buried in their psyche or it can be very powerful and destroy their conscience.

Everyone’s anti-conscience must be eliminated through consciousness because it is very dangerous and it can invade the conscious surface at any time.

Even when it is deeply buried in someone’s psyche it can suddenly invade the conscious surface like a volcano.

Dream analysis and therapy is a deep process of transformation that works as a mental health treatment, spiritual purification, and mind empowerment at the same time.

The transformation of your personality depends on a behavioral change. You have to stop acting like a cruel demon that merely pretends to be human and become a true human being.

You have to be able to understand other people’s pain and show compassion. You have to respect your moral principles. You must have the behavior of a saint.

Sound mental health depends on goodness and wisdom.

Keys To Good Mental Health

  • The first recommendation deals with sleep. Most professionals recommend eight hours of sleep per night for adults. More than eight hours may lead to depression or at least sluggishness. Less than eight hours may lead to anxiety or nervousness. However, I maintain that sleep does not have to be completed in one block of time. Personally, I sleep for about three hours, work on projects for an hour or two, sleep for another one or two hours; then I nap once or twice during the day when I’m tired. Sometimes naps last an hour, sometimes only ten minutes. I think the key is to sleep when your body tells you it needs rest. Of course, I’m semi-retired, and my schedule may not work for most professionals.
  • A conscientious diet is helpful for mental stability. I recommend a diet high in omega-3 fatty acids. Those can include, most nuts and seeds, but most helpful are walnuts, sunflower seeds, ground flaxseeds, and soaked chia seeds. I like to soak my chia seeds in milk overnight and that combination ends up similar to a tapioca pudding. Cold water fish provide substantial omega-3 fatty acids – sardines, salmon, trout, char, and herring lead the parade in this area. Avocado is another helpful food in this area. Low fat proteins are helpful including beans, chicken, fish, and turkey. Of course a diet grounded around fruits and vegetables is important, and finally probiotics are helpful for digestion. Those can include pickles, sauerkraut, and yogurt.
  • Another important step includes respect – respect yourself, treat yourself, and value yourself. Find a hobby like fishing; go to a nice restaurant or a movie once a month, keep a journal of your thoughts, or even go shopping.
  • Exercise is another important aspect that bolsters your self-esteem and overall mental health. An outdoor walk, especially in a park or the woods – that provides, fresh air, strength, and the sun can provide much needed vitamin D to stave off depression.
  • Finally, it is helpful to engage with others face-to-face. Conversation can provide a feeling of worth. It is beneficial to get off the smart phone and deal with people in person.

Motivation and Perceptions

A patient of mine had a painful knee-joint for months. She had tried physiotherapy and other forms of treatment and nothing seems to have worked. She was still in pain and felt very miserable and depressed. Looking at her I could see that she was a big woman carrying a fair bit of extra weight. She was middle-aged and was looking for a job. Her knee stopped her from looking for a job. When questioned about her weight problem she became very tearful and she said she had tried everything in the book to lose weight but nothing worked. She hardly ate anything but still could not lose weight. This made her even further depressed. Yes, reality for her presented a grim picture.

Then there was another elderly patient who was also overweight and had knee problems. She had also tried to lose weight but was never successful. She was also depressed about the situation and said she hardly ate anything. There are millions of people in this world today like these two in the same boat experiencing similar problems. They all have one thing in common. They are all looking outside themselves for the solution to their problems. That is, they all think that there is a magic pill out there that will solve all their problems. But is it not that what we all do when we are confronted with a problem? Yet the solution lies within every one of us if we are prepared to look at ourselves.

So how can we help an individual to get out from this negative state into a positive mode? How can we motivate a person to start looking at reality in a different way?

The magic of course lies in the power of our perception. Unless we become aware of this power and use it with some insight to tackle our problems, we can never change. We will be constantly struggling to solve that problem. So how do we go about doing that?

To be able to change one’s perceptions firstly one has to be able to look at oneself. Most people dare not look at themselves because what they see makes them feel uncomfortable. A lot of people have poor self-image. They might even say they hate themselves. Now if you cannot look at yourself in the mirror and do not like yourself, you will never change no matter what you do. You will always be a loser. Why?

This is because it is how you use and stimulate your subconscious mind that counts. Our subconscious mind is the most powerful force that you can use to help yourself and if you block it with a negative, you are defeated even before you start the journey.

Therefore the first thing you have to do is to say to yourself, “I like myself. I am my own best friend” even if you do not mean it. Why do you have to like yourself? Why do you have to be your own best friend? It is simple. You are born in this body and die in this body. You may be the ugliest person on earth, it does not matter. You cannot trade-in this body of yours for a new body. You are stuck with it. So whether you like it or not, you have to like yourself.

Now why must you be your own best friend? You are the only person who lives with yourself 24 hours a day with your thoughts, hopes, fears and desires. No one does. So, married or single, it does not matter, you have to be your own best friend. And if you are own best friend, you should treat yourself nicely and with respect, shouldn’t you? You should learn to take care of yourself.

Then tell yourself, “No one is perfect; there are lots of things I don’t like about myself”‘. Please make a list and then start at the top. “How can I improve here, how can I change there… “

Once you have orientated yourself this way and started thinking this way, you will be amazed to find how positive you will feel about yourself and instead of making mountains out of mole hills, you will be able to turn mountains into mole hills.

It is important to remember that the way you talk to yourself affects your subconscious mind. The meaning of the words does not matter but the type of words you use can have an instant effect. For example, do not say “I hope I will be fine”. Instead say “I am fine”, even if you don’t feel that way, you will feel a lot better. In the first instant you were creating instant doubt in your mind when you were saying “I hope”. Hope is a negative word. Do not you use it frequently in your mind as it is just a bad habit. If you keep doing it, you will suffer anxiety.

Your healing power lies in your subconscious mind. You have to learn to use it. By acquiring self-knowledge you can make life easy for yourself because it is the subconscious mind and how you stimulate it that counts. The world is not going to help you acquire this knowledge. This is the consumer world where everyone panders to your ego and where the consumer is always right. It is an escape orientated exploitive world we have created. In fact the laws of the land lead to us to believe that one is never at fault. If something goes wrong, it is always someone else’s fault. Yes, the world outside you is constantly distorting your perception of reality. If you do not correct it, you will make life very difficult for yourself and suffer the consequences.